Guest Devotion: Dan Duncan

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Ephesians 5:21-23

21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

As a Marriage Enrichment Sunday School teacher, I have heard various comments about this scripture. Men often misinterpret it as a free pass to lord over their wives as an absolute ruler. Wives often discount the viability of the verse because we live in a “different world” than when this verse was penned. As Christians, we should acknowledge that God’s word never changes and that it’s just as viable today as it was in the first century.

For the correct interpretation of this scripture in context, one has to read the verses immediately following these in which God instructs husbands to “love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it”.

Marriage was created by God as an institution in which both partners compliment and enrich each others lives. I believe that most Christian women would have no qualms with the submission ordinance described in this passage if more husbands would fulfill their Biblical obligation to cherish their wives as a gift from God and as a “Help Meet (suitable) for them. Men should encourage their wives to walk beside and not behind (or in front of for that matter) them.

So how do we as men work toward become the spiritual leaders that God intended us to be? Here are some suggestions:

1. Pray as Solomon did for wisdom. Proverbs 1:7 says that “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction”

2. Take the lead! Don’t wait for your wife to lead your family spiritually. That’s your job and God will hold you accountable.

3. Find out what makes your spouse “tick” and do it! If it’s important to him/her, it should be doubly important to you. A small carress or holding his/her hand in pulic says “I love you and I’m not afraid to show it.” A turn at washing dishes or doing a load of laundry says “I know you have a tough job and I’m willing to share in it.”

4. Don’t be afraid to show affection in front of your children and never oppose the decisions your spouse makes in front of them. This undermines them as authority figure. Showing affection, on the other hand, shows them that your spouse is the most important person (next to God of course) to you.

5. Share devotion and prayer time with your spouse. Building each other in the faith and sharing mutual burdens during the tough times strengthens a marriage like nothing else. Humans have a basic need for support and encouragement and many marriages today end in divorce because of a spouse’s unwillingness to provide this most important service.

Christ epitomized humility through His life and submission to death on a cruel cross. We as Christian couples should epitomize it through our love and service to one another. Remember, you may be the only Christ that someone sees today!